MEET LEIGH MCKAY
Leigh McKay currently lives in Central Florida. She is a proud mother of three amazing kids. She has one brother and four sisters. She earned her bachelors degree from Florida State University, Masters from Troy University, and Specialist degree from University of West Florida. She is also a proud veteran of the U.S. Army.
Leigh has worked in education for 10 years. She enjoys working with and encouraging the youth she has been privileged to work with. Through her experiences as a mother, teacher, and a person, she has learned that her passion lies in helping others overcome the challenges of home environments, peer pressures, social influences, and inner struggles. Leigh finds great pleasure in seeing others successful. She is a fan of the underdog.
We all are destined to live an abundant life. Life comes with its share of ups and downs but Leigh believes we can allow them to build or break us. However, we must choose to be victorious if we are to have true change. All situations are learning experiences. We either learn from them or continue to make others responsible for our needed changes. Either way, we choose the lasting result.
WHY I WROTE THIS BOOK
It is my sincere desire and prayer that my experience will help someone navigate through any tumultuous or emotionally taxing situation. I pray my suggestions and words of wisdom are received and executed with good intentions. I do not believe in simply getting by or just getting through a situation. Work must be done with an intentional goal in mind. I think we should learn from every trial in our lives. I hope true change is the end result of those who read my book. I pray you become a better, wiser, happier person. I am hopeful that, after this reading experience, you will have a new level of thinking, expectations, love, peace, and joy.
Before I learned the many things I have shared in this book, I thought I had it all together – even people around me felt the same about me. I am a well-educated young lady. I am a great mother and I do an outstanding job in my career. I have worked hard to do many of the things I have been able to do in my life, however, I was a terrible mess on the inside. Although I appeared to have it all together, my emotional and spiritual conditions were in desperate need of TLC.
I am eternally grateful to God for His healing hands. He has changed my life tremendously. God has done things that I once thought were impossible to do in my life. Of all the accomplishments I have made, I am most proud of the work God has done for me. He has healed my heart. He is my hero! He saved my life from me. He rescued me from a life of lies and turmoil. I know that money, sex, degrees, prestige, expensive gifts, etc. could never do all He has done in my life.
I am no longer afraid to be weak because I know He is my strength. I have learned to be still because I know He moves on my behalf. I no longer feel the need to put my strength and independence on display in order to prove a point. I know the effectiveness of meekness and humility. I can be submissive without fear of being mistreated. I am great without recognition. I am better-sense I accepted His love for my life. I am a well-kept woman.
Educated, independent, self-sufficient women often get a bad rap for being too strong, too independent, and too tough. For me, I felt that I had to be guarded because I had been hurt so much for so long by so many different people. It became my defense mechanism. No one seemed to look out for me with the same level of care I had shown them, especially men. I felt that no one went the extra mile for me but they were more than happy to benefit from my labors of love. Like most women, I wanted to be vulnerable, nice, and emotionally available with others but it usually backfired when I tried – especially in relationships with men. I was an emotionally crushed woman after years of the same disappointments and hurt.
Like myself, I think many people, men and women, put so much effort into avoiding hurt that they lose the gem they really are. Sadly, they do not even realize it after awhile. Justifiably, they do what they think is necessary to not get hurt again. Unfortunately, they do not allow themselves to be open to genuine love later. I will always believe even the toughest, strongest, most guarded man and woman is kind, loving, and very loyal. I believe they want to be vulnerable and in love but they need to learn to trust again. He or she must learn to trust God to heal their emotional scares. Believe that He will be with them through the healing process. Trust God to be and do everything others have failed to do – be a genuine, unconditional lover. Then, he or she must trust that God will send the man or woman designed and created for them – only them.
I made the biggest mistake of my life when I put a man in a position to be my emotional savior. I nearly destroyed my life because I had to have a man. I almost lost it (my mind, my dignity, self-respect, etc.) because I was willing to be treated any kind of way just to keep him. I made him and my idea of love the gods of my world – bad idea on my part.
I wrote this book to help someone avoid this situation all together. However, it is for those who find themselves in the midst of turmoil and need a compass to help them get out. I also wrote this book because there were so many people who told me many different things I should do. People told me many clichés when I was married and when I was getting a divorce. People told me things that sounded good and made a lot of sense but very few people were able to tell me “how” to do anything. Everything was easier said than done, especially for them because they were not as emotionally attached to my situation as I was.
I was told, “You just need to move on” or “Get over it; you will be okay.” Of course I wanted to get over it but I often struggled with how to get over it. How do I get over it? How do I move on? I was hurting and had no clue of what to do with the way I felt on the inside. I was expected to smile and act as if I was okay. I knew I would be okay eventually but I could not sit by and wait for things to get better. As I considered the emotional condition of those around me, I knew I needed to do something different. I was eager for a change. So, I pieced together information that was given to me and prayed that God would work a miracle in my life. He has done just what I asked of Him. Will you give Him a sincere try? You will not be disappointed.